My boys are growing into men. Not today, but gradually, moment by precious moment. Boys are naturally risk takers, my middle child even more so than my oldest. In his book, Wild at Heart, John Elderidge says that boys long to hear "You have what it takes to be a man". This is so hard for me as a Mommy-well Mom-my boys call me Mom now. My first instinct is to protect them from harm, any and all, which may or may not occur. What they need from me is to hear, "I believe in you." These words unspoken or spoken could mean the difference in fear of failure or the courage to try. Every parent wants their child to have the courage to try.
As I observe them establishing their space in the world, often times I have to hold myself back. When they were younger, it was letting them climb to the top of the slide by themselves and slide with out catching them. Now it is watching them from the shallow end, (with my youngest), as they play, Cross Pool in the deep end with the bigger boys.
By allowing them a small amount of danger they are learning about their own limits and are taking responsibility for their own actions. We may encounter a few skinned knees, and a stitch or two on this rite of passage process, but my hope is they will be strong, confident men of God.
Dear God,
Please give me wisdom in allowing the boys enough adventure and risk to give them confidence and courage, so that they may grow into the strong warriors for Christ, that You have called them to be. In Jesus Name, Amen.
Psalm 4:8 "I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety."
2 Timothy 1:7 "for God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."
Proverbs 4:11 "I guide you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths."
Matthew 3:17b "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased"
4 comments:
(Whaaaaaaoooooohhhhh)
Anytime these not-so-little-anymore ones takes one of those next steps somewhere, it is really hard. Sometimes, you do have to prayer about your own fear, because to them, there isn't any. Sometimes, your concerns are realized, and then you have to work through those situations with them--reassuring and, sometimes, working them up to try again.
And then there are those times when you may fear, but they do amazingly good things. I have to hold back tears then, because I realize that God truly has His hand on them.
Your blog gave me a tummy ache. I am not ready to "let go" yet. Just the thought - oh my. Yet, I do see the beautiful young lady my #1 is, and little #2 is turning the corner. I need to take heed of your words. My fear has caused a cautiousness in my #1. I need to tell her to fly, and let he go. (*sniff*!)
Your blog is SO very true. And just wait, it gets harder and harder. This year I had to get out of the driver's seat and let my "baby" get behind the wheel and drive away. In 2 seconds I went from having total control on everything he did and everywhere he went to....well, almost no control. I pray he stays safe. I pray he uses good judgement, I pray he is a courteous driver, I pray he doesn't use or ride with anyone that uses drugs or alcohol (a whole new worry once they get to be teenagers), and Pray the OTHER cars stay out of his way. Then I wave goodbye as he slowly (at least while I'm watching) drives away. (sniff)
Ah. I've got two boys, too...as you know. Thanks for sharing this wisdom with me as we enter into the "I can do it by myself" stage of toddlerhood. I've got a long way to go until they are not-so-little anymore, but your reflection is a solid piece of advice that I must take into account along the way. May we raise gentlemen who live life the way God intends them to.
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